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Personal development - a personal introduction you won’t want to miss!

By EugeneYeng Subscribe to RSS | November 28th 2011 | Views:

When I say to people that I can make them a very important introduction that will change their lives, they usually look very curiously. Then I tell them that this person is someone who has the biggest influence on their lives; whether they like it or not they begin to look a bit nervous or even disbelieving as well. Strange, that they haven’t met this person before if they are so important and influential for them – so they really must know them already, then I explain that they may have caught a glimpse of them now and again but that it can take time to discover and build up a real relationship with this person. At this point I’m beginning to loose them a bit – as I notice their eyes flicking side to side as they try to recall such a person. Who on earth could it be? parents, children, partner, friends?

By this time they are confused and sceptical but a bit of them is interested as well – they might, at his point move, be rocking on their heels as they continue to search and speculate. You can see their faces reacting to internal searches – minute muscle movements and they search and speculate on who on earth this might be or what exactly I am on about and what sort of deception I am weaving for them.

How on earth do we get through life with someone controlling our lives and we don’t know about it? This idea is patently ridiculous. Once you have been properly introduced to this person you realise that they have been there all your life always helping you always taking on the bigger tasks in your life, protecting you, planning your future, organising your thoughts for you,

If we accept that the conscious mind can only process 7 -+ 2 items of information at one time then how on earth can our conscious mind be complex enough to run our lives? The answer is that it isn’t. The functions of the Unconscious minds are often referred to as the Prime Directives of the Unconscious mind

? Stores memories ,

? Makes Associations (links similar things and ideas, creates patterns in our understanding)

? Learns Quickly (can learn in an instant)

? Organizes all your memories

? Manages memories and unresolved negative emotions

? Runs the body

? Has a blueprint:?of body now ?of perfect health (in the Higher Self)?

? Preserves the body

? Maintains the integrity of the Body?

? Is the domain of the emotions?

? Is a highly moral being - The morality you were taught and accepted

? Enjoys serving, needs clear orders to follow?

? Controls and maintain all perceptions

? Receives and transmits perceptions to the conscious mind

? Generates, stores, distributes and transmits ‘energy"

? Maintains instincts and generate habits?

? Needs repetition until a habit is installed

When we realise that we have this capacity and can use it more purposefully then we realise then we suddenly have a very powerful relationship with our own minds which gives us much increased capacity.

When we are very young there is less and less distinction about the roles of conscious and unconscious – we naturally have an instinctive relationship with enables us to learn and develop successful beliefs, values and behaviours rapidly and easily. As we then go through our teenage years and into adult hood we become more and more inhibited and almost estranged from this relationship. To restore the working relationship takes some time. Consider:

You have a relative – a close on who you have lost contact with over the years – you decide to drop in –go round to their house and knock on the door unannounced. What sort of reception do you get? Confused, cautions, as well as welcome, at this first encounter there is a limit to hoe far the relationship goes. On the second visit you get a warmer reception, on the third warmer and so on. Its just the same with developing a relationship with your unconscious.

Two Brains or Four?

Then there is the well-established view of the different tendencies between out right and left brains with Logic Analysis problem solving being associated with the left brain and creativity being associated with the right brain.

Each one of us is said to have a dominant hemisphere which is interesting but not entirely fixed and does not form a label for any of us. What works for a person with a left brain preference may not work with a person with a right brain preference. If we want to learn anything effectively we have to learn to activate and engage different ways of learning so that all of our capacity is engaged.

Representational Systems

Do you get the picture, like the sound of something, have a gut feeling, like to have all the facts in front of you? We all have preferences in the way we manage information re receive from the outside world. Becoming aware of our own representational systems is one step, becoming aware of the representational systems of others increases dramatically our ability to communicate, express ourselves and understand our own thoughts and emotions.

Behavioural Preferences

We all have a set of preferences for different behaviours. Again these change over time and must not be seen as a way of labelling oneself. If you think for a moment of something you are very motivated to do. Are you motivated because you want to move away from negative consequences or towards a desirable goal, are you somewhere in the middle? Once you know about your behaviour preferences then you not only have a better understanding of yourself but you will immediately notice these in others.


Beliefs are a strange construct. We know they are important but we are often hard pressed to say exactly what they are and how we know them. Take our beliefs about the earth being round – we all know it and accept it but we only have some-one else’s word for it unless we are an astronaut. Beliefs are representations of values and behaviours and the consequences. We might think that our beliefs are fairly set in stone – many of them are culturally framed such as the current beliefs about drinking and driving. However the beliefs we are less aware of have a huge impact on our behaviour. Lets take a common one - ‘I was brought up to believe I can do anything I want to do provided I work hard!’ – believing you can do anything you want is fairly supportive but the caveat – provided I work hard, immediately puts limits on the former belief. In fact this belief says you have to work hard to have anything. When its written down its much more obvious, but its something I’ve heard many people say as if they have no limiting beliefs. They are very subtle but so - so powerful and so difficult to spot on our own.

How about that introduction then?

You can look through the self improvement shelves at the bookstore you can spend a small fortune on Amazon but the only way really get this introduction is to work with someone who has the insights, understanding that will unlock the door for you. So who exactly has the skills to open that door for you? The key is to work with either an NLP coach or to undertake NLP training. Why Neuro Linguistic Programming? NLP is the based on epistemology or the study of how we think we know what we think we know. It has its roots the study of human excellence which mainstream psychology and neuroscience are rapidly catching on to as the keys to understanding the human mind and performance. NLP is about understanding how we represent our experience to ourselves, how this representation affects our emotions and behaviours and giving ourselves choice over all of these. How on earth can you have choice over a belief that there is something in the world you just cannot do? If you think about it all of our thoughts are represented to ourselves in a particular way – as an image sound or feeling or example – but there are more ways. If the belief is represented as picture it will have attributes which tell you it is a belief about something you cannot do - it might lack colour or motion for example – if you give it sound and motion then it is immediately less compelling.

NLP Diploma courses are an excellent introduction to this amazing area of self discovery. You will learn useful concepts which will challenge your beliefs. You will begin to learn about how your mind and body work as one system. You will learn how to use the internal resources you already have to support you in the here and now. You will learn key parts of your personality which you didn't know were there.

Once you have undertaken an NLP DIploma then your next step would be to complete a NLP Practitioner course. When choosing one of these ensure that your trainer is the right person for you and find out about which the different 'codes' or schools of NLP they operate from. Essentially you will learn best through high levels of demonstration, supervised practice and high trainer to client ratio. You should look for at least two trainers working together and trainers with assistants are generally of better value than sole trainers.

EugeneYeng - About Author:
Andy Lee is a certified NLP Coach Master Practitioner and Trainer with 30 years experience in people development in education working with hard top reach individuals and families. He is an expert in people development in a range of contexts and achieves outstanding results in a very wide range of contexts. He contributes to leading on line forums and leadership and personal development sites. He operates in the North of England as a Coach and trainer. He offers the NLPremium Practitioner which is believed to be the most exciting personal development opportunity in Europe. He has an international reputation for excellence in coaching, training and people development.

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