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What is online marriage Counseling

By Dr. Lee Subscribe to RSS | December 9th 2011 | Views:

A sloth in your sex life? Here’s what you can do to kill it

• Share your apprehensions or deep-rooted problems with a friend or an elderly family relative you feel free or lastly consult a therapist

• Sex is just one of the ways to bond with your partner. You should also indulge in doing other things you enjoy.

• If distance makes the heart grow fonder than this is what you exactly need. Don’t become too dependent on your partner.

• Developing Sexual Intimacy

Life post marriage

Life is of course a little different after marriage. There are challenges after you have the first baby. One of the first challenges is that there is less time to spend together. The couple time that was so easy to find before having children is something that now has to be carved out.

The decrease in time is coupled with decrease in energy. Lack of time and energy often leads to a lack of sexual desire. This is especially true for women. In the twilight zone of raising young children many women find that sex is the last thing on their mind,only to later find out what they have missed and cannot get back.

One of the important male/female differences is the frequency and intensity at which sexual desire is experienced. Recent research stated that almost l in 3 women expressed difficulty in feeling sexual desire even though they expressed that they were happily married. For women, sexual desire seems to ebb and flow while men rarely experience much ebb! What are some of the contributors to lowered sexual desire? One study found that women stated lack of energy as the main reason why their desire for sex was low. The more tired a woman becomes the less she is apt to think about sex, want sex or have sex. Smart husbands have learned that helping their wife enjoy a good uninterrupted nap may be a magnificent foreplay.

Another contributor to a woman's lowered sexual desire can be decreased emotional connection in the relationship. Couples may enjoy parenting their children and meeting their children's needs but may take the relationship for granted. It's easy for couples to forget to cultivate closeness and friendship. Women often need to feel close before feeling sexual and men often need to be sexual to feel close.

We can be tired, preoccupied and busy but if we are making time to connect the relationship will continue to grow. During the childbearing years many women struggle with a negative body image. Very less percentage of women felt sexy post pregnancies. Both men and women struggle with unrealistic body image expectations.

A woman should feel positive about the body type and often see themselves unclothed in the mirror to reassure themselves of what they are.

The most important barrier to sexual intimacy esp. in South-Asian countries is to let their children sleep with them. Having children sleep with parents in any consistent way is unwise, inappropriate and unhealthy for the children and for the marriage relationships.

Children need to learn that their beds and rooms are safe places to be and parents need to have the bed be the place where they bond and are intimate.

We live in a world, where culture is ever evolving. All of us are busy. Every day we deal with external demands and internal expectations. When you add children it's easy for the marriage bed to become a place we fall into at night and crawl out of in the morning. It is very essential to strike the right code of balance between your duty and desire and to carry both with equal importance.

Dr. Lee - About Author:
Dr. Lee holds a Doctorate of Philosophy in Christian Counseling from New burgh Theological Seminary.She attained both her Bachelor's and Master's degrees in Social Work from the University of Akron.

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Marriage Counseling
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