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What is Limerence: a Love or Attraction?

By Bryan Subscribe to RSS | March 9th 2012 | Views:

Limerence has a connection to love and affection. It can be said as infatuation or desire for a person, a feeling that one expresses for the loved ones. Limerence in simple words is having attraction for a person which was introduced first by a psychologist Dorothy Tennov in 1977. She was the first women to explain what is limerence which was later explained further in her book “Love and Limerence”. This book was published in the year 1979.

In this attraction or Limerence, the person gets emotionally bind to other person and feels strong desire to own that person in his/her life. Moreover, the person who desires also gets involved into sexual desires which make him/her weaker to fall into relationship. This attraction is kind of near obsession where one person already falls in love and sets to do anything to achieve the person on whom he is attracted to. However, this is not the real love. Limerence can be counted from limited to high level of attraction, crush or infatuation. At the end, this strong feeling could lead the person into nowhere or could make him realize the reality. It stays for shorter period and makes the person realize that chances to get that person are very less.

There is a lot difference between limerence and love. A limerence cannot be said as love as it is the one sided affection or desire to achieve that person where the chance of starting a love from both the sides is quite difficult. As per the theory described by Dorothy Tennov, love and limerence both are two different types of feelings that could transform into former over the time. Indeed, the relationships are found to be progressed in similar way. It could be said as love at first sight which in other way is the limerence at first sight. This limerence or infatuation gradually transforms into love.

If you are facing limerence then the symptoms are easily recognizable. You will either feel shy or nervous with the presence of that person. Your reactions could be caught by other person easily, especially those who stays with you. Also, the person feels constant fear of being rejected by the opposition party whom he likes. Here, the person’s mind keeps on thinking about the desired person and it keeps reappearing in his mind constantly. Because of continuous thinking about that person, the obsession expands in various ways. At the end, when the fantasies do not turn into reality, ultimately the first person gets disappointed and the limerence then begins to fade.

Bryan - About Author:
There is a difference between limerence and love and is an attraction or infatuation that remains for shorter duration. Limerence brings attraction or desire for a person, but it is the one sided affection that on later stage is realized by the person. However, it is very important for one to understand what is limerence before he feels that it is nothing but love.

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